Monday, September 26, 2005

Eloquently Put

Read this story from a person who was in Louisiana helping out.

I am wowed by it, and by the fact that there are so many like it.

You say it my birthday?

I must be getting older. It's my birthday and I really don't care.
My mom made us dinner and a cake last night...(my favorites) and babysat Saturday night so we could go see a dumb movie (I voted for The Constant Gardener, but was overridden by somebody's desire to see Four Brothers.)

The movie was so dumb that I wanted to leave halfway through but J said (while agreeing it was dumb) if we spent $30 we might as well watch the whole thing. I disagreed, but being a cooperative sort I sat there making exasperated noises and tapping my fingers on the armrest and rolling my eyes until it was over. Then we went to play poker, but there was a poker tourney we were fifteen minutes too late to join (and I did point out that if we had left the dumb movie when I wanted to, we could have joined) so we just got the kids and went home at nine. woohoo

I spend Sunday alternately doing homework and waiting for J to come home from work and then went to my mom's for dinner.

I really feel as though I should be disappointed in the non-climactic nature of this birthday, but I'm not. I guess it's being busy with school and J opening the new store it just really doesn't matter. I do, however plan on filing this away for later use, say when I need a weekend away by myself..."but I didn't even get a birthday present this year.." Ha.

Considering the last few birthdays I've had, it's actually been quite nice.

September 26, 1999... I am at my grandmother's funeral mass. My mom feels bad for me so she sticks a candle in a piece of pie and whispers "Happy Birthday."

September 26, 2000... I am just coming home from the hospital after giving birth to my first child. There are many uninvited guests coming in and out of my house and I spend a good portion of my birthday hiding in my bedroom learning how to breastfeed.

September 26, 2001... I'm working at a new job, having just finished 2 giant family parties for Mason's 1st birthday, in the throes of post-partum depression.

September 26, 2002... I'm trying to keep my new coffee shop above bankruptcy, but J sends me roses.

September 26, 2003... A great birthday weekend away from the kids visiting good friends, but newly pregnant.

September 26, 2004... Having Mason's fourth birthday party, dealing with extreme negativity from my mother who wants me to snap out of my second bout of post-partum depression.

So, 2005, while quiet, is nice enough. ALthough I would enjoy a 2003, minus the pregnancy. Maybe next year.

Friday, September 23, 2005


Just busy. And good. I swear I have to be bi-polar. Because after all my poopy feelings the last month or so, it's good. AND EXCITING! FOR! NO! REASON!

I have a confession.

I am really, really, horribly bad at being a stay at home mom.


I am really good at being a student, with a babysitter who straightens up my house before I get home and does my laundry!!

And a husband who doesn't mind if I lock myself in my office doing homework while he tends to the children!!

I am loving life right now. I am totally the geek who the teacher speaks directly to when he's lecturing , with a stupid smile on my face, nodding in agreement at everything he has to say.

"Evolution is the process of beneficial heritable traits out-surviving the least beneficail heritable traits in a given population over time..."


"The addiitive inverse of three fourths is negative three fourths while the reciprical of three fourths is four thirds...."


"Interpersonal communication can be qualitative and quantitative, while impersonal communication is simply quantitative.."


I have lots of homework every day... and I am totally digging it. It's only been a week this quarter, but full-time college seems to be the place for me. Initially my plan had been to go for three years and get my X-RAY Tech certification, but now I feel like I really need to just go for it and become a Radiologic Oncologist because that's like ten more years of school!! WOOHEE!!

OK, I cannot imagine feeling this way during finals week but I'm on a high now which I will ride for all it's worth. I'm going to go explain the Scientific Method and factor some polynomials now.

Don't wait up.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I wasn't going to bother...

I have had such a bad run of luck the last week or so involving by rebellious physiology. Major dental issues, (2 temp crowns, 1 perm crown, loads of pain) and an odd swollen purple node on my jawline that I was told by my dear dentist was a leftover "bruise" from my last round of novocaine (not infection, as I had feared.) Upper respiratory infection complete with sinus pain and the runny nose that won't quit, plus a deep chest cough that I'm sure my smoking doesn't help at all. A herniated disk (disc?) in my back, which has been there forever but seems to be hurting more due to the physical therapy I chose as an alternative to back surgery.

Added to the stress and guilt I feel because I can't stop watching the news and the constant fear that's gripping me about the breakdown of society (which I am trying not to riff on because it will just get me more worked up.) Let's just say Bush making 2 supreme court appointments in the wake of an illegal war and a devastating natural disaster makes me want to go buy fifty pounds of grain and a hand-crank radio. And a cow. I have babies, after all.

Hopefully when school starts next week I will be able to get my mind to stop this circle of madness. And when J gets home tonite I can take some Nyquil and pass into a deep, satifying coma.

See, I shouldn't have bothered.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

It's the patriotic thing to do...

Go here.

Impeach Bush.

All I'm saying is that if a president can be impeached for lying about a blow job, than the current president should be impeached for lying about his motivation for invading IRAQ.

Let's not even get into how poorly he handled the two largest US disasters of the last fifty years.

Or Civil liberties violations. Or Tax cuts for large corporations like Walmart.

Patriots support the Constitution, not the guy in the oval office. It's our constitutional duty as Americans to oust a tyrannical leader.

Even if he is just a puppet for the Cheney/Rumsfeld machine.

Man, I hate this guy.

Batteries Charged.

I had a great weekend in Reno, the wedding was a beautiful outdoor affair, we spent some time gambling, winning just enough to justify losing more (whoops) and seeing family. We were able to swing staying in a couple of nice hotels, and we had dinner oone night at a fantastic Japanese place. (I had the Chateaubriand, of all things, Tepanyaki style. Buttah, I tell ya.)

John and I had several good laughs, and I remember more clearly why I love him. A good weekend, in all, and most importantly for me, recharged my batteries for at least another few months. I was reaching critical levels of self-pity beforehand, and now I just feel stupid. Yeah, poor me. I think I need a good bitch-slap every now and again, but a weekend away works much better. I must find a way to do it more often.

Now, to spend time with my kids, I missed them terribly.

Friday, September 02, 2005

My airplane Broke.

In better news, I wasn't on it yet.

After waiting at the local airport for over an hour (which is a lot to wait here, only one airline) we were told our flight would be delayed two hours, which messed up our connecting flight. So we're back at home, and we'll leave at 5:15 AM. Yikes. I am more disappointed at the early hour than at not flying tonight. I laughed when they told us. I also got a lot of glares, but oh, well. I was just happy it didn't break mid-flight. So I get to Reno 12 hours later than expected, no big deal, as I will be sleeping for at least half of those.

My folks still have the kids so John went to go get ice cream and we're going to watch Million Dollar Baby on pay-per-view. Good times.

I feel like I should be more upset about this, because John is, but I am relishing the down time. Although I am contemplating cleaning up kids' bedrooms tonight instead of watching a movie. Nah, it's lazy time for me. Yippee!

Wherein Nature inadvertantly smacks my spoiled, pouty face.

Recent events have me crying and counting my blessings. Thank you, dear blogfriend (you know who you are) for your words of encouragement. And Thanks, Mo, for the offer of a break. I will take you up on it ASAP.

Tomorrow we are supposed to leave for what was once planned as being a fun weekend without the kids. Then it became frought with tension, then up in the air about what we would do once there. I am so over it. If my tickets were the regular, refundable kind, I would cash 'em in and send diapers and formula to New Orleans. I can't imagine enjoying myself with what's going on so close to home.

Since I can't cash'em, I will go, and enjoy my husband, who is still alive and buys me food and clean water. I am in no position to send any kind of financial help to the Gulf . Give me some ideas. Maybe set up a foundation for the orphans of this storm?? And fund it when I get out of school? (I briefly considered spending all my student aid down there and blowing off the quarter, but that's stealing.)

Speaking of stealing, did anybody see that spot W did on Good Morning America? When Diane Sawyer (I think) asked him about people who are stealing diapers and food for their children in response to his take on looting, he said something along the lines of "There will be no tolerence for breaking the law."

I hope the War Crimes tribunal has the same attitude when he's on trial.

I weep for the future.

I guess I should go enjoy a few days of decadence, because the way this country is headed I doubt I'll see any more chances like that in the Post-Bush future. It's all gonna be illegal search and seizure, civil unrest, huge energy crisis, (note to self...hook a up a generator to the internet) and grinding our own wheat.

Ambien kicking in, must sleep. More later. I have a lot of predictions for the next ten years.